Time Apart

March 15, 2011

It’s the first time in our marriage that my husband went away for one week.  I thought that I’m not going to survive such long separation but for the first four days I was doing fine.  It was like as if my whole body was ready for it and my mind was making me busy with attending to my kids and doing some writing.  And I was thinking that maybe this separation time was great for us to also have our own individuality.  So off I went with my everyday tasks of doing the laundry, doing some cooking, writing a few articles and taking care of our two sons.  

Then the fifth day came and I was having a heavy heart.  Maybe because I’m missing my husband already or maybe I just don’t want to feel alone.  I went to buy some groceries and usually my husband would follow there after work so we could go home together but that day was different.  It was like as if the thought of him being away had already sunk in and I had to admit I can’t take it.  With so many miles in between me and my loved one was not for me.  

For those husbands and wives apart from each other because one has to work far or abroad, I have to say that I salute your courage to take such challenge.  But I realized that it’s not for me.  We both promised that if one goes out of the country or move somewhere then the family goes too, no matter what.  We do not want to experience ourselves the life of being not together.  

Oh it would be a nice thought to have high income with a spouse working abroad.  However, I would give up those comforts as long as we are intact.  I am willing to sacrifice some things just so I can be with my family.  I don’t want to dwell on thinking of what it would be like if we are distant from each other.  

This is my choice of life.  Life is short so I’m investing my time on family relationships.  I want to have a close family.  I’m not saying that families with a parent working away in a distance are not intact for some have healthy relationships even if they are not together.  All I’m saying is that I like the way things are going right now with my family being all here in one place.

So for those families with a member in another country to give a comfortable life back home, don’t despair.  You chose to have a life like that.  You are a willing participant to such a life.  Stand by your decision.  In the end, all the things you have let go to have a life of financial abundance for now may be worth it.  As for me, I’ll work my ass off where I am sitting so I can contribute to give a little ease of burden on my husband’s part as he is the family’s breadwinner and do as much as I can to spend time with my little kids who are growing very fast by the minute.