On Weddings and Marriage

March 7, 2011

A lot of my dear friends are getting married nowadays. In just a span of three months, four of them are finally hitched. One thing I love about weddings is when the bride starts walking the aisle towards her groom. That moment really turns my heart into mush and my eyes just brim with tears. It always makes me go back to the time I did my own walk down the aisle. A feeling of overwhelming pure joy. A sense of fulfillment that no one can measure. It’s more than being in cloud 9, it was a piece of your own heavenly moment. And it’s all mine for the taking. It even gives me goose bumps while writing this, taking me back to my very own blissful moment. No matter how I describe that moment only the married ones can relate to that, sorry singles.

Weddings are great manifestations of the love shared by the couple. It‘s as if the couple have overflowing love that they need to give away their joy with relatives and friends in such a traditional way. I read love stories of people getting married saying that their story is unique, that their chemistry is just amazing and that few people ever find such love. But I would like to disagree. If that were true, then only a few would get married and settle down.

I would like to believe that couples who get married have their love story to share. I don’t want to burst anybody’s bubble by saying that you are not the only one who found love or the one to share the rest of life with or telling you that you’re love story is not far from ours, it may be unique but it’s still a story bound by love. I would like to think that all the brides who walked down the aisle felt the same joy I did. That somehow we look forward to happy ever afters even if the old married couples say otherwise. But in our own little innocent minds, we want to believe that we will have better marriages and happy at that.

Up until now I still believe that I have a happy marriage. Maybe better but definitely happy. Somehow reality sets in and you noticed a lot of things you haven’t noticed before and usually they are not so good ones. But you accept those little things as long as it doesn’t compromise with your core values. And the happy ever afters? You have them once in a while sometimes in unexpected ways. But you do get your own dose of happy ever afters. Those happy ever afters keep you sane amidst the challenges that you face in marriage life. And you do get a lot of them. And that’s when you face reality right on because you have decided to have a happy marriage. And with that you can say that you were right when you got married. Cheers! ;)

SLEEP

Most people would think that being a full time mom is an easy task. When I was single, and that was not so long ago, I thought so too. Taking care of your baby is something that will come naturally to mothers and you will have fun time always. Well, that is just plain wishful thinking.

It’s been two years and five months that I am a full time mom and I have to tell you it’s no easy task. Oh the motherly instinct is always there, you know when the baby is hungry, sleepy, etc. but just like in everything any person wants to do there is always a sacrifice attached to it. Having no job is no sacrifice at all since I chose to be with my kids fulltime.

What I’m sacrificing a lot lately is pure and simple deep sleep. You know, the kind of sleep when you close your eyes and it’s still night time like 10 or even 11pm and wake up refreshed and energized at around 6 to 7am. That’s the sleep I have been wishing for the last two and a half years.

Today is one of my most sleep deprived day. Louie slept at 12midnight last night and to think we were in bed at 930pm. I let him tire out on the bed, allowing him to roll over as much as he wanted to until he cried but that didn’t work. I thought that he was sleeping already by 11pm since his eyes were closed while feeding but he woke up after. Oh well. So I just let him do whatever he wanted to do in bed until he decides to sleep and finally he did. But by 2am, he wanted to feed again. Then by 4am and by 530am. And he woke up at 830am. Ugh. Since he was not crying and did not want to feed, I guess he’s full after feeding every two hours, I just closed my eyes for awhile to rest them even for a few more minutes.

Thankfully, my husband picked Louie up from bed and let me sleep for a few minutes more without worrying about the baby. Then I have to wake up, eat breakfast, take a bath, bathe Louie and make some lugaw for him. That’s my usual morning routine for the past month already.

Complaining much? Well, not really. I’m just amazed how a woman and a mother at that can somehow feel alright after all the sleep deprivation. I mean I can still get up and go and do whatever needs to be done and it’s not just limited to taking care of the baby, I’m doing the laundry, cleaning our room and at times cook for lunch or dinner. And once in a while I do bake when I have orders or when I just want to eat my desserts or my lasagna (and when hubby asks for them). I can still remember when I was in college, and being a sleepyhead I usually make up sleep whenever I can and sleep was not as deprived as it is now. Maybe I have upgraded, ha-ha.

Being a fulltime mom has its perks too. Louie’s sleeping now and what else to do? Make up some sleep, of course. Good day! ;)

HUG

The weather is terrible nowadays. It can be sunny the whole day then rain pours during the night. Like today; sunny in the early morning then it rained suddenly, the sun came out in the afternoon and tonight the rain just stopped. Gosh I’m talking about the weather. But I have to include the weather because I think it’s affecting the health today.

Hammie just had fever and is still having cough and I hope he’ll be well soon. Last week was a worrisome week for me and my husband because you can really see that Hammie was not feeling well. He looked weak. He slept a lot and wouldn’t eat. Good thing he would still drink his milk. His fever was not high but it’s there and his cough was very dry he almost lost his voice.

Being a fulltime mom, I can monitor Hammie’s condition and his medicine intake. He was still playing at times but most of the time he wants to be carried. Good thing by Saturday he was okay to go to church for an anticipated mass. My only prayer was that he would be healed. Then I got worried because by Sunday his cough was very slow in healing and the fever got high. When we got to my parents house he slept and he sweated a lot. He sweated profusely that the pillow got wet. God heard my prayer.

The next day, he was still kind of weak but we wanted to cheer him up so we brought him along the mall to buy some groceries. Before we went back to the house, we decided to buy some magazines and while my hubby and I were squatting by a shelf choosing a puzzle book, Hammie then stood between us, placed each of his arms around our necks and gave us a big hug. Well, that was a good sign that he is getting healed.

Hammie is back to his bouncy self even with a little cough. He wants to play a lot. At times I would be too tired to play but today I’m so glad he wanted to race with his mama. Thank God for hugs.

On Being A Full Time Mom

October 2, 2009

Yesterday was the first year of my being a full time mom.

I can still remember my former officemate saying I'm lucky to be just at home taking care of the baby. And I can still recall the HR's 'Wow, ang swerte mo naman!' when she knew that I'm resigning to be at home with my son.

It wasn't so difficult for me to decide to be a full time mom. I mean if I were to choose between family and work, i would definitely choose my family any time, no matter what. Even if I have to sacrifice some extras that my income can afford for my family, I would still choose my family. I have always wanted to be a housewife.

After a year of being a full time mom, I could say that I really am blessed to be with my son everyday. Come to think of it I was only separated from him for maximum of three days (when I went to manila early this year). I have witnessed most of his milestones that most mothers nowadays don't experience. I'm not discounting that some moms really have to work, but I'm just glad I was there for my baby. Though I did have a yaya for six months and I needed one because my baby was born through C-section and I had to return to work back then after two months of maternity leave. But after eight months until now, it was just me and my baby.

Looking back, it was all worth it especially with just me, my husband and our baby and no yaya. Back then, most of the prepping was by the yaya. When there was no yaya, my husband and I have to make a schedule as to what we need to do. And to this day I'm very thankful for my husband who is a very hands-on dad. My hubby usually bathes our baby in the morning (he wakes up earlier than i do) and evening (because i'm too tired after the day's babysitting) and does the bottle sterilizing. I do our baby's laundry and I babysit all day. My hubby does the babysitting when he gets home from work.

So for now, basically that's my daily routine being a hands-on mom. Sounds boring, I know, but I'm loving every moment even with all the tiredness I feel and the sleep deprivation ever since I gave birth. And no it's never boring raising a child especially your own. =)